Never On Sunday (1960)

Here’s another instance of romanticized prostitution, but this time it’s absurd enough to be believable. Melina Mercouri received an Academy Award nomination (and was named Best Actress at Cannes) as Illia, the “beautiful and corrupt” whore whom the local men treat with respect, and who gets to choose with whom she plies her trade – she sleeps with the men she likes, not just anyone willing to pay. As usual, the only way women could be portrayed as sexual creatures in movies back then was to make them either exotic foreigners or prostitutes; in this case, director Jules Dassin cleverly does both. Dassin casts himself in the film (and does a bumbling Tati-esque shtick) as a scholar travelling abroad in search of “the purity that was Greece”; coming across Illia and her sexy overbite, he declares her symbolic of all that’s gone wrong with this once-great land. “A whore can’t be happy,” he declares, and he resolves “I’ve got to educate her – she’s an outlaw!” He deceives himself into thinking she’s just an intellectual project for him, and bit by bit he replaces her free-spiritedness with shame. It’s the triumph of pure reason over emotion, perhaps what caused the cultural decline of classical Greece to begin with. Sunday constantly toes the line between maturity and standard Hollywood formula, always pulling back before it collapses into cornball. In the hands of any other director the film would probably have aged badly, but Dassin deftly poses the question of who’s assimilating whom by the end, and we’re instead treated to an obscure classic.

 

New York, New York (1972)

It's unfathomable that the same person could be directing The Last Waltz at the same time - that film's so wondrous, and this one's so harrowing. Martin Scorcese somehow succeeds in adding another nail to the Hollywood musical's coffin with this big-budget headache that only entertains when Liza Minelli sings, which is not often enough. Robert DeNiro swaggers about as Jimmy, the most annoying bandleader to grace the screen; he's an absolute wild card always on the edge of violence, and how Liza's Francine could ever warm to such a self-obsessed man is the film's biggest quandary. Liza's all lips, nose, chin, and eyelashes, and her hair and dresses are largely a fright, but compared to the patently false exteriors she almost looks normal. (The actors also do a poor job pretending to play their instruments.) New York is actually two different films - the sucky, implausible, and joyless first half which follows Francine's rise to stardom, and the more explicitly musical second part which shows her on the Broadway stage with that glorious voice of hers. Pity Scorcese makes you wait so long for the good stuff - if possible, time it so you don't make it to the theater until the intermission, because until midway it's a far cry from anything you'd call entertainment.

 

The Night Porter (1974)

Liliana Cavani starts with an interesting premise – what if, years after the war, a former Nazi concentration camp intern runs into the officer who sexually subjugated her during her imprisonment? – and somehow succeeds in making it less interesting than it sounds. The film adds a curious twist – camp survivor Charlotte Rampling, it turns out, enjoys being abused and dominated – but once she abandons her comfortably domesticated postwar life and returns to Dirk Bogarde’s cruel embrace, we lost sight of whatever’s motivating her, and any film that squanders Rampling deserves endless maledictions. Instead we discover there’s a secret network of ex-Nazis throughout Europe policing each other’s behavior so as to avoid anyone naming names, and the M-ish setup wildly digresses from the story elements that truly intrigued us. The daring Rampling is, as always, a delight to behold; pity the secondary components that eventually overshadow her are so painfully dull.

 

Nil By Mouth (1997)

Yet another dreary yarn set in lower-class England where we discover Brits can be as vulgar as Americans (see Ladybird Ladybird or Naked for more bleak examples). Everyone's drinking and smoking and bullshitting, the breadwinners all seem to be involved in vaguely criminal dealings, not a sentence passes without a shovelful of obscenities, the men are all emotionally arrested, and their women all put up with it. Gary Oldman wrote and directed this cheery romp which records the various dysfunctions of a brutish father and his punching bag of a wife (who is allegedly thirty but looks closer to sixty), their grown son who descends into drug addiction, and various members of their extended family who make various attempts at tough (and not so tough) love. There is nothing fun about this picture, it's simply a matter of how bad will things get, but it all rings sadly true to anyone not living in a bubble. As usual, the menfolk only want to live it up all the time (you'll notice they never have just one drink with them at the bar, but always at least two), and the womenfolk are all willing to settle for less. Somehow the film manages a not entirely dismal ending, but since it's clear the sins of father visit the son several times over, you're not about to hold your breath waiting to see a group hug. Featuring one of the more innovative sequences in recent memory, where Oldman visually alternates two scenes but never separates the audio tracks; though a great actor, Gary needn't fear quitting his day job if so inclined.

 

Ocean's Eleven (2001)

A glorified vanity project for Hollywood's A-list men's club, where we're just supposed to revel in how cool and smooth everyone is while they simply phone it in. This remake of the 1960 Rat Pack extravaganza is strangely lifeless from start to finish, probably not least because these casino burglars' success is preordained. A cast of VIPs from George Clooney to Matt Damon to Don Cheadle to Brad Pitt exercise star wattage but minimal acting chops in plotting, executing, and decamping from an elaborate Vegas heist that gives the atrociously overacting Andy Garcia (the manager of the joint) fits and the audience a smug sense of vicarious superiority. But here's the problem - despite all the chinks that seem to pop up in their plan, our slick masterminds had it all figured out from the start, and there was no hint of a challenge. Without any element of risk there's also no real accomplishment, just as director Steven Soderbergh's directing-by-numbers fails to inspire, and the recycled hipness is all we've got. Ocean's' material is ultimately beneath both cast and crew, and Julia Roberts' Tess (formerly Clooney's gal, then Garcia's, then guess who she ends up with) is quite possibly just a gold digger, which sabotages any real romance as well. (It would be a nice twist for the sequel to see Tess double-cross them all, à la Dirty Rotten Scoundrels.) Clearly we're supposed to take everything as a triumphant given - including the film's own success - but to be human is to make up your own mind, and you have every right to see Ocean's for the flimflam it really is.

 

Oliver! (1968)

A boy who’s a dead ringer for Hallie Eisenberg’s brother tossed about by fate amidst squalor so dense it hardly seems appropriate for a musical. It’s not exactly a fantastical or romanticized escapist setting in this, considered the last great screen musical of its age (the genre would pretty much run out of gas for the next thirty years), but despite all its Oscars® it hardly qualifies as among the best. The dance numbers sure aren’t dull, and the highly detailed sets are no small achievement, but the plot doesn’t really get going until the second half, and by then you may have ceased to care. If Oliver! was a sensation when it first hit theaters, it’s failed to age well, and comes across as ephemeral and hardly the acme of its species. Indeed, Carol Reed’s relic may’ve somehow become the nail in the musical’s coffin for the duration, which only something as daring as Moulin Rouge! could later exhume.

 

The Omega Man (1971)

A good friend insisted I grab this off the shelf at the video store when I said I was writing a review of 28 Days Later last summer, just in case I was going to praise the latter for any perceived originality; turns out once you've been around long enough the recycling of ideas gets easier to identify. Here we've got Charlton Heston (already long in the tooth, but not too long for many shirtless scenes) driving around a deserted Los Angeles (although if you look really carefully, you can see one pedestrian in the distance in one scene), and screening the Woodstock documentary for himself in a dusty cinemathèque ("held over for the third straight year," he grumbles). Turns out a Sino-Russian conflict in the early seventies escalated to germ warfare, and most of humanity got wiped out. Those who remain have turned, or are turning, into mentally-unstable photosensitive albinos, and LA's afflicted have gathered into a Luddite secret society (complete with witch robes) led by Anthony Zerbe's Matthias (you'll recognize him as one of Zion's elders in The Matrix: Reloaded) who decries modern machinery, weapons, medicine, science, and electricity as nothing but trouble, since they're what led to their current woes.

Heston's Colonel Robert Neville, a scientist who's come up with a vaccine for those who haven't yet turned, hunts for Matthias' nest during the day, and endures their medieval assaults on his brownstone by night. Director Boris Sagal (who cranked this out for Warner Brothers, "A Kinney Leisure Service") clearly banked on the urban playground of a deserted metropolis, the zombies' Marilyn Manson contact lenses, Heston's star appeal, and the occasional corpse to carry the film, but the inappropriately cheery soundtrack, distracting plot holes, and a lazily symbolic ending all make 28 Days Later look like a vast improvement. Man's similarities with Days are numerous, not least the pairing of a white guy with a badass black girl (plus a kid or two), but this return-to-the-dark-ages conflict with opponents who are but a pale (get it?) shadow of its virtual remake's ferocious monsters fails to thrill or chill.

 

One Day In September (1999)

Once again Germany fails the Jews. Be warned when diving into this documentary - the most unpleasant facts are saved for last. Everyone's familiar enough with the Israeli athletes and coaches being taken hostage by Palestinian terrorists at the 1972 summer Olympics in Munich - this is the year Mark Spitz won just about every race in the pool, and the Soviets were handed extra seconds to defeat the USA in men's basketball - and though 27 years after World War II the mere presence of the Israelis here was brave enough, it was perhaps ill-fated from the start, here in the city in which Nazism was born. Stemming from their enduring national guilt over their "recent history" with the Jews, the hosting West Germans insisted on no police or armed security at the Games - a "nonmilitaristic" image that in the end jeopardized their guests' lives. (By contrast, the Greeks have already invested just over one billion dollars in security for this summer's Olympiad.)

Day cleverly profiles participants from both sides of the situation - a Palestinian revolutionary and an Israeli fencer, both of whom would meet a violent end. And whereas the Israeli government's official policy was to never make deals with terrorists (otherwise "no Israeli life is safe"), the sometimes black and white, sometimes color footage of the event shows the Germans were hopelessly stymied and botched the rescue attempts in innumerable ways. Those failures of competence come across as merely pathetic, but what they arranged later is simply unforgivable - staging a fake airline hijacking to send the surviving Palestinians back to their homeland, in the hope the PLO would agree never to disturb German soil again. Justice is cowardly thrown out the window, and the anger this film sparks is enough to make you resolve never to give that country your tourist dollars. At least that would finally communicate that actions have consequences.

 

The Opposite of Sex (1998)

What's shocking about this movie isn't how Christina Ricci's trailer-trash teenager tears her way through the lives of everyone around her without a shred of conscience - it's how so many of her victims subsequently feel morally obligated to save her from herself. Most of us would be glad to see her gone and to pick up the pieces, relieved it isn't worse, but instead we find Martin Donovan pursuing her all across North America to ensure her unborn child has a good home, and his former gay lover sticking with her for the sake of that child, even at risk of imprisonment, and even after it's been proven not to be his offspring. Ricci's unredeemable delinquent deserves none of this, and therein lies the draw of the film. The Opposite of Sex is rightfully classified as a comedy, thanks to a richly witty script, but in the end we are chastened by the response of those who, once deceived and used by Ricci, do more than just act to preserve their own interests. It's an act of faith, a course of action rarely considered in a cinematic world typically ruled by revenge fantasies. And perhaps that explains the movie's ambiguous title - at least with sex, you're guaranteed to get something out of it.

The Others (2001)

The gothic third of Nicole Kidman’s 1-2-3 knockout punch in 2001 (with Moulin Rouge! and Birthday Girl that year, Oscar® attention was inevitable), here we find her cast as a doting mother of two on Jersey in the Channel Islands in 1945, waiting for her husband to return from the battlefield and shielding her photosensitive son and daughter from sunlight’s reach. There’s no telephone, radio, or electricity, probably not so unusual for the time, but all of a sudden the servants absent themselves as well, and Nicole’s forced to hold the fort herself. (Like she isn’t micromanaging things enough already – she inexplicably forces the children to always lock the door behind them every room they enter or exit.) Eventually a trio of new servants arrive to assist, but there’s something vaguely creepy about them, and the kids insist there’s a ghost of a young boy running amok in the house; their traumatized dad’s arrival only adds to the confusion, as he stays only for a night, then trudges away for good. It’s difficult to fathom exactly where The Others is aiming most of the time, but you’re no less tense for it, and the final revelations reward your patience with twists you’ll throttle yourself for not foreseeing. This is a solid story with spooky atmospherics devoid of cheap shots or expensive CGI, the plot scattering red herrings in all directions. The children may be a little too forgiving of their mother’s actions in the end, but this deceptively modest pic’s games are eminently forgivable.

 

Le Pacte Des Loups (The Brotherhood of the Wolf) (2001)

Some savage quadruped of impressive size and indeterminate species is tearing people apart across the countryside of 1760's France, and Pacte ends up mirroring its feral subject both in its ambitious scale and in its inimitability. You just never know sometimes what those crafty French are gonna come up with - and here they tried cooking up a blend of Matrix-y martial artistry and pre-revolutionary political intrigue with mixed results. When the musketeerish Gregoire de Fronsac is called to the scene with his Mohawk Iroquois companion Mani to get to the bottom of things, they find plenty of opposition, both from the surprisingly savage indigenous peoples littering the land and from the various nobles in the castle with their own special agendas. It's easy to get lose in all the subplots, but just as easy to be dazzled by the array of costumes, the intricate sound design, expressively photographed landscapes, and thoughtful designs of mundane objects from bullets to fans that make this barely civilized culture look subtly glamorous. Directors Christophe Gans and Pascal Laugier keep their own creative juices flowing by throwing in brief slo-mos in the middle of all the derriere-kicking, presenting flashbacks in photonegative, and making witty cuts in which a pair of breasts in one scene turns into a range of snow-covered mountains in the next. There's no end to the visual delights, and that's even without the curious creature with fangs of iron and claws cooler than Wolverine's, or Mani himself, who's one hell of a piece of work. Pacte's phantasmagory just succeeds in counterbalancing its overwrought and somewhat nonsensical storylines, but even if it is a mess, it remains an admirably ambitious one.

 

Palombella Rossa (1989)

Or, translated literally, Redwood Pigeon - which makes as much sense to me as all the political theories Nanni Moretti tosses about in this supposed comedy that uses an extended water polo match as its ostensible setting. It seems Moretti's character is disillusioned by the Italian Communist Party's declining relevance in recent years, and while his sad-sack recreational water polo club takes on a more polished rival team in a multi-day tournament he works through his ambivalent feelings out loud, Moretti's films are never less than entertaining, but Rossa probably cannot help but alienate viewers who aren't up to speed on the fortunes of the Italian left. There's very little concrete political speech one can latch onto, and when his concerns shift to the importance of one's choice of words in the course of linguistic exchange, it's clear the intended audience is much more narrow than its video distributors probably hoped. The match serves as a therapy session for him, but all seems forgotten when Dr. Zhivago appears on the TV at the concession stand, which all the players and spectators watch transfixed. (Moretti may've abandoned his quest for a point at film's end - but there's always the consolation of the movies, he seems to be saying.) Whimsical, but irritatingly vague.

A Passage to India (1984)

I picked this up to see how my favorite actress, Judy Davis, earned an Oscar® nomination for Best Actress, and what proved surprising is how little the film is about her. Ostensibly recounting how Davis' Adele Quested, during a visit to the colonial subcontinent, brought a friendly native doctor to trial for attempted rape, A Passage to India more accurately covers the friendship between the accused Dr. Aziz (Victor Banerjee) and a British schoolteacher, Richard Fielding (James Fox) who doesn't distance himself from the locals like most of the colonial occupiers. David Lean, who adapted E.M Forster's novel, directed, and edited, is even-handed in honestly presenting both the chaos of India and the British who will gladly rule any number of developing nations but wouldn't dream of associating socially with their subjects. Thrown into the mix are Davis, set to marry a magistrate assigned to India, and her soon-to-be mother-in-law Mrs. Moore (Dame Peggy Ashcroft, who did pick up a Supporting Actress Oscar® instead), both of whom are sympathetic to the indigenous culture but are affected by it in different ways. For her part, Davis gives a surprisingly subdued performance; you're more likely to be impressed by the chameleonic Alec Guinness, a Lean staple, as an enigmatic and vaguely insincere brahmin. There are also the grand scenic shots to take in, as well as the clever plot devices that demonstrate, despite the artificial separation between the two peoples, how both the British and the Indians take stock in arranged marriages. The racism of the English and the obsequiousness of the Indians will prove unsettling, and that is most likely the point; it's up to the individual to decide whether to respond with anger or forgiveness.

 

Paths of Glory (1957)

They may not have thought so fifty years ago, but nowadays black and white can make most any old film interesting enough to watch. Too bad that’s about all that’s of interest in Stanley Kubrick’s first big-budget Hollywood feature, a war movie that’s very quickly no longer presenting any warfare. In 1916 France, an abortive assault on a German fortification so embarrasses the French commander he orders his own troops fired upon – at least then they’ll be more scared to turn back than to sacrifice themselves charging forward. Blaming the maneuver’s failure on the men’s rank cowardice rather than his own miscalculations, he orders three soldiers court-martialed and executed for “mutiny” – which is somehow supposed to boost morale among the rest. You’d think we’d end up with a military tribunal drama along the lines of Breaker Morant, but this film’s far too talky, cold, and analytical to hold your interest. (It doesn’t help that most everyone from Kirk Douglas and Adolphe Menjou on down the line insist on conversing in stage whispers – I think I missed significant chunks of dialogue, but not for lack of trying.) the only actor who truly impresses is Ralph Meeker, as one of the condemned, who’s frightfully sexy amidst all the cynicism.

 

The Perfect Storm (2000)

By now most everyone's heard the story of the Andrea Gail, the world's unluckiest swordboat, and its fatal run-in with the storm of the century out in the Atlantic. Six men died in one last-ditch effort to reverse their failing fishing fortunes on that well-worn ship in the fall of 1991, and their addition to the Gloucester, Massachusetts Wall of the Dead was first commemorated in a best-selling book inevitably screaming for translation to the screen. Yes, you know what's going to happen to Clooney, Wahlberg et al, but you'll be thoroughly terrified nonetheless. The Perfect Storm's streak of brilliance is paralleling the Gail's plight with that of a tiny yacht near Bermuda equally imperiled by the storm, and of the coast guard crews who attempt to rescue them all. (Note to self: the coast guard is NOT a job I want.) Director Wolfgang Petersen succeeds in weaving a coherent tale out of chaos, but the result is still hell on your nerves. It's all a fitting memorial to the men and their families, as well as their fishing community whose love of the sea regularly whittles their numbers down.


The Phantom of Liberty (1974)

Ah, signature Buñuel, where people behave utterly civilized in patently absurd situations. Most infamously, in this film, the public and private spheres are switched: instead of a dinner party it's a pooping party, with toilets all around the table, and meals are consumer individually in a room down the hall. (One child is reprimanded for brazenly declaring she's hungry: "Don't say that at the table!") Phantom takes on more of a Monty Python-esque structure of stringing together largely unrelated scenes, all of them turning some societal convention on its head. One couple goes through their photo collection, aroused by shots of banal highway overpasses and disgusted by the Arch de Triomphe; later, their bedroom hosts a parade of animals, and the next day they report their daughter missing to the police, even though she's right in front of them the whole time. The sexual innuendoes get tiresome, but Buñuel never could resist trying to shock - there's plenty of gratuitous cheesecake shots and obligatory digs against the church, neither of which scandalize like they used to. But in other areas he proved eerily prescient, such as the autograph-seekers in court mobbing the man just sentenced to death, and the smattering of terrorists and snipers wreaking havoc in the cities. For the mid-seventies, it's clear Phantom was a few steps ahead of the curve - let's just hope the pooping party wasn't anywhere near it.

 

The Piano Teacher (2001)

To their immense credit, my own music instructors in my youth did me an enormous favor by forcing me to consider whether I was having fun throughout my piano and flute studies; they risked losing a steady source of income were I to realize that just being proficient wasn't enough. That's what makes all the more depressing Isabelle Huppert's turn as an utterly joyless conservatory facultant who cultivates coldness and indifference in her students. (Such an aesthetic must still be valued in some circles, since teachers usually want to be well-represented by their legatees, and she hasn't lost her job yet.) Dowdily attired, distant from her colleagues, and apparently into genital self-mutilation (the gelogenic look on her face when she later tries to urinate is pretty disturbing), it's therefore baffling that Benoit Magimel's wholesome engineering student would be so drawn to her. He's like a ray of sunshine, but she can't endure anything resembling tenderness, and their explosive romance (if that's what you want to call it) eventually falls prey to her need for humiliation. (Like it isn't dodgy enough she still shares a bed with her elderly mother, played with ugly ferocity by Annie Girardot.) Director Michael Hanecke's definitely done better, but his steady focus on long, quiet, mundane moments takes lots of courage. Immersed within and indistinguishable from her character, Huppert's certainly deserving of her Best Actress award at that year's Cannes Film Festival - you can virtually see the gears turning in her head when she contemplates her next soulless gesture - but the relentless portrait of sickness becomes quite ridiculous when she insists on spelling out her masochistic fantasies to her young lover (the audience I sat with broke out laughing). Unless Hanecke was aiming for his own unique brand of ultra-dark comedy, he's fallen way short of anything actually worthwhile.

 

Pillow Talk (1959)

If memory serves, my household in the seventies shared a party line with some folks up the street, a charmingly medieval telephone arrangement that sets events in motion in Pillow Talk. Don’t let the tagline fool you (“it’s what goes on when the lights go off!”), Doris Day and Rock Hudson are decidedly not amorously chatting when the film opens. Hudson’s a swinging songwriter with a bevy of females at his beck and call, and interior designer Day fumes over always overhearing his come-ons every time she tries to call a client. Ever true to his gender, Hudson marvels that a single woman can be professionally successful and live alone and be satisfied with her bachelorette existence, so he poses as a rich Texan (they’ve never met in person, you see) and tries to seduce her off her airs. Everyone has great comic timing (and Day even snagged herself an Oscar® nomination for Best Actress), not least Tony Randall (as Hudson’s selfish pal) and Thelma Ritter (as Day’s boozing housekeeper), and though the innuendo-laden script ends with a formulaic inevitable Hollywood reconciliation, it gets there via surprising avenues. Viva furs and booze and Cinemascope™!

 

Pink Narcissus (1971)

A boy with bedroom eyes and a butt that could launch a thousand ships enters into a fantasy world to deny the sordidness of his actual sex life. Echoes of Kenneth Anger permeate this erotic reverie in which Bobby Kendall is either lounging in his very pink and very gilded apartment in see-through matador pants or degrading himself in a public restroom. He later casts himself in a Roman setting, then among sheiks, but always preoccupied with all things phallic and libidinous. The self-proclaimed "anonymous" director (actually Jim Bidgood) isn't psychologizing our oft-naked cherub but asks us to simply enjoy what we're looking at, from animated creatures in an oneiric forest to a city street filled with horny men and vendors selling stimulators ("get 'em while you're hot!"). Some scenarios go hardcore, most drastically minimize their wardrobe budget, and none bothers with dialogue, so this one will be filed under avant-garde for sure, but thanks to fantastic lighting it's never not pretty. And despite Narcissus' alienating narrative trajectories, its final message is as true as anything: nature pays no heed to gay obsessions - the beautiful A-listers will age just as fast as the rest.

Pitch Black (2000)

Definitely among the most overlooked films of 2000, thanks to a feeble advertising campaign with commercials that did little to suggest it was anything other than forgettable (note to marketing: look up "self-fulfilling prophecy"). In fact Pitch Black is intelligent, sexy, and terrifying, and hardly deserves to be shunted with the neverending torrent of B-grade horror/sci-fi flicks regularly wasting screen space (*cough*Event Horzon*cough*Supernova*cough*). Here we find a credible cast of characters stranded on a former mining colony planet (by means of the highly plausible vagaries of space travel, which most films rarely touch upon) set to be totally eclipsed for the first time in decades (rare because of its three suns), upon which the nastiest sort of nocturnal creatures will ascend from below the surface and enjoy a human smorgasbord. Add to that the variable of one escaped serial killer off the ship - the only one who can see in the dark - some fantastically executed special effects, and the occasional revelation that few among the remaining examples of humanity are morally uncompromised, and you're in for one hell of a scary ride, not without its plot twists that show a script with some thought put into it for once. One hopes word of mouth will raise Pitch Black's stock until it is lionized as a perfect example of the greatness you can squeeze out of a modest budget, and how NOT to market a good film.

 

The Plot Against Harry (1969)

A gem of a film that might have been completely forgotten but instead achieved hyper-belated notoriety for being inexplicably shelved, unreleased, for twenty years after its creation, The Plot Against Harry manages to construct a palpable world in eighty-one minutes when many movies fail to do so in two or three hours. After nine months in prison for racketeering in horse races, mafioso Harry Plotnick immediately starts re-establishing his territory in New York City, rounding up all his old Jewish, Puerto Rican, Asian, and Italian underlings and finding plenty of resistance among those who used to fear him before he was busted. It's never fully clear whether Harry is small-time, or big, or formerly big, but he's certainly likeable, and it's easy to believe he could command loyalty. A freak car accident reunites him with his ex-wife Kay, their two daughters, and their respective families after what seems to be a good number of years, and everyone's remarkably sociable with each other. Harry subsequently ingratiates himself back into their Jewish subculture, one where it seems he has a huge backstory. This becomes the film's unique genius: instantly convincing you of Harry's numerous and lengthy relationships with the delightful supporting cast, it feels like there could've been many, many movies in their shared pasts, and we're only seeing one of the final installments. Eventually Harry's extensive networking and wheeling and dealing so soon after release start arousing suspicion in his parole officers, and their scrutiny coupled with Harry's increasing health concerns move him to change course and clean up his reputation. Donating generously to various charities organized by Manhattan socialites, blabbing to a televised government commission exploring the connection between organized crime and legitimate business, joining a Mason-like temple and appearing on the radio, it all helps soothe his conscience but opens up his past to even more police investigation. (And all this in under an hour and a half!) Director Michael Roemer astonishes by dropping us into a microcosm of New York City's multi-ethnic criminal subculture with instantly believable relationships, suggesting a world of depth with the briefest screen time. The authorities eventually extend their inquiries to his loved ones, and Harry's guilt increases under the pressure leading to a very public and ironic heart attack (on the set of a telethon for heart disease), and a final act of selflessness brings an amusing result no one ever expected. Despite how Harry's situation seems to only get worse, his perpetually resigned smirk illustrates this is a film filled with humor, and The Plot Against Harry becomes a primer on filmic economy and a major find of any year.

 

Positive (1990)

Positive works as an historical primer of the first decade of the AIDS epidemic in the United States, and especially New York City, where approximately one quarter of Americans with HIV were residing in the late eighties. Acting in collaboration with local journalist Phil Zwickler, himself among the infected, Rosa vonPraunheim documents the major figures, events, and issues surrounding the crisis when complacent federal, state, and municipal governments crossed paths with virulent (so to speak) activists and their various organizations demanding to be heard and acknowledged. There's Larry Kramer, ever eloquent, enraged, and critical even of the gay community, Michael Callen's PWA Coalition, Diamanda Galas and fellow artists expressing anxiety and fire through their work, and GMHC and ACTUP. It's sometimes explicit in presenting an issue in which sex plays a major role, but it's never unclear in its central message: the fight to get help to those with HIV was inextricably linked to confronting society's homophobia, and though AIDS has never been just a "gay disease," its perception as such contributed to the authorities' complicity in ignoring the disease for as long as possible. Tragically, it's that institutional sluggishness that has helped spread the virus to the heterosexual population beyond expectations, and twenty years later everyone's in the same boat.

 

Primary Colors (1998)

I may have missed the point to this film, but my dominant impression afterwards was: boy, politicians sure eat a lot of crap. Certainly the central message couldn't have been how divorced a moral character is from effective politicking, because the nation's disgust at the interminable impeachment hearings in 1999 proves that Americans don't have a problem with morally bankrupt politicians as long as they're doing a good job at getting us what we want. Perhaps Primary Colors, in failing to shock, becomes then an essential document of American politics, where it's understood by all that dirty deals are necessary to succeed in Washington. Kathy Bates, in the film's most impressive performance as the moral center, then becomes an anachronism, since "fighting the good fight," i.e. cleanly, isn't enough to win. Perhaps it's always been this way. "We didn't know how the world worked," argue Presidential candidate John Travolta and First Lady wanna-be Emma Thompson, "this is the price you pay to lead." If none of that moves you, though, the ending will: after watching John & Emma play dirty all the way to the inauguration, we find the Presidency stripped of all nobility. And this is the price we, the electorate, pay for allowing it.

 

The Producers (1968)

Of the millions who've flocked to Mel Brooks' Broadway musical of the same name, many are probably unaware that the film on which it's based won no less than an Oscar® for Best Original Screenplay; if anything, it deserves praise as a herald of the now-legendary art of creative accounting. Gene Wilder and Zero Mostel mount a big-budget stage production of "Springtime for Hitler" (funded by donations from Mostel's bevy of octogenarian mistresses, all of whom have a fondness for role-playing) in the hopes of declaring a substantial loss (which, from a tax perspective, can be enormously profitable). Brooks laudably understates the black humor of two probably-Jewish impresarios soliciting a script from a Nazi sympathizer - and when the Busby Berkeley-fied final product makes its premiere, with the intentionally-miscast Dick Shawn (named "L.S.D.") hanging loose as der Führer, one wonders if German distributors ever dared touch the thing. Christopher Hewitt's cross-dressing director will forever taint your memories of "Mr. Belvedere," but it's Wilder's neurotic delivery that steals the show ("Scared - can't - talk!") even when the ending seriously whiffs. Three decades later, the resurgent Brooks must be echoing Mostel's famous line when his plans bypass all expectations: "Where did I go right?"

 

Quai Des Orfèvres (1947)

Henri-Georges Clouzot won Best Director at Venice for all the details of this police procedural which threatens to overflow with murder suspects and risks losing us when it appears the detectives know more than the film's willing to tell us until the very end. Aspiring singer Jenny Lamour (who carries a mean tune even with a cigarette in one side of her mouth) pines for fame and riches, and her lower-middle-class husband Maurice frets she may step beyond the bounds of marriage to get to the top. She spends an evening with a lascivious old producer, Maurice follows them to his place, and by the time they both have left the scene the geezer's dead. (Oh, and Jenny's gorgeous and protective lesbian photographer pal apparently snuck in later to try and erase any sign of Jenny's presence.) So whodunit? It falls to the haggard Louis Jouvet (who's adopted a kid "from the colonies") to tighten the investigative vise around all three to see who cracks first - and crack they do, but the revelations of what really happened that night are not what you expect. (Nor is a scene where the cops treat the local pederasts with respect.) But Quai's biggest surprise is the subtle shift from a standard murder mystery to a humanistic portrait of Jouvet's Inspector Antoine, who grows in stature from a nuisance to a genuinely sympathetic codger. Don't expect to keep up with the plot twists - but do expect to enjoy the ride nonetheless.

 

Querelle (1982)

Although not all sailors fulfill their commissions with filmworthy experiences (cf. Potemkin), their romantic lives are often of interest to the homoerotically inclined, and Rainer Werner Fassbinder's Querelle does a world of good for those with a weakness for men in uniform. Lucky us that Brad Davis is cast in the title role, as a painfully handsome French seaman with burgeoning tastes for crime and sodomy; unlucky for us that the film fails to render more accessible Jean Genet's source material, whose antisocial philosophies constantly equate homosexual attraction with violence and murder. (Most tellingly, the eponymous title character's name translates into "quarrel.") Fassbinder sends Davis cruising through a fantastically impressionistic and oversexed French port city of Brest, inflaming desire in the locals just as much as his ass yearns for attention from the menfolk. Querelle's immeasurable desirability even affects his brother Robert, who crosses his path at a brothel whose owner demands all patrons play dice with him upon entering; if you win, you get whomever you choose, if you lose, the owner gets you. (In Genet's pansexual universe, however, many don't mind losing.) Querelle gives us plenty of pro-homosex moments, with macho types nonchalantly declaring their love for manflesh, but Fassbinder willfully obfuscates the proceedings with hyperliterary narration, improbably profound dialogue delivered with impassive contempt, and far from illuminating textual intertitles. Meanwhile, Genet's weltanschauung is telegraphed loud and clear, with Jeanne Moreau's housemadame repeatedly singing "Each man kills the thing he loves" as the men smolder around her. There's way too much talk, but at least those talking are easy on the eyes; though the semantics threaten to bog the film down, it'll turn your crank one way or another.

 

 

Ratcatcher (1998)

You may feel the subject matter's been done many times before - a family's travails getting by among the indigent in post-industrial urban England - but never quite like this. Previous entries in the genre (Nil By Mouth, Naked, Ladybird Ladybird) are explosions waiting to happen, explorations of just how badly people can treat each other; Ratcatcher takes it all in through the eyes of a child (12-year-old James, played with an authentic blankness by William Eadie), and a child will do everything to keep things as playful as possible. For once a film doesn't pound its point into your head over and over - this film instead maintains an unexpected peacefulness among the endless vulgarities and disappointments and humiliations. Director Lynne Ramsay refuses to stage events for their dramatic value (there isn't even a musical soundtrack); developments happen under the surface, and even the occasional death is recorded with ample detachment. It's a despair that refuses to organize itself around some sort of climax and resolution, for which we can be grateful, and the result is an almost Zen-like experience. Filmed in musty blues and greens by cinematographer Alwin Kuchler.

 

The Reflecting Skin (1991)

Though co-produced by England and Canada, The Reflecting Skin stands as a potential successor in the tradition of independent American gothic cinema (per the dictionary, "a style of fiction that emphasizes the grotesque, mysterious, and desolate"), the next in line after original classics like Night of the Hunter, River's Edge, and Near Dark. This 1991 production takes place somewhere in rural hillbilly country in the late forties, though its look is inscrutably timeless and plausibly contemporary. Eight-year-old Seth Dove, never having seen any different, can't seem to recognize that he's surrounded by a gallery of freaks: his dad's more than a little jittery, his mom's a totally frazzled basket case, his neighbors are a pair of twins who resemble Wednesday Addams, and the local sheriff has only one each of eyes and hands. Such is Seth's lack of perspective that when his dad is revealed to be a pedophile and sets himself on fire, or when Seth finds his best friend dead in their well, he's more entranced than distressed by the spectacles. But this film is not that simple - Seth himself is far from perfect, willfully terrorizing an English widow (named Dolphin Blue??) down the road for no apparent reason, and I won't even discuss what he does with a dead baby he stumbles across. The film is to be applauded for such a realistic rendering of kids (who are never completely heroic and upright, regardless of what Hollywood says), and The Reflecting Skin has won a cult following for its unflinching portrayal of the nightmares of childhood that mainstream films shy away from and sugarcoat. "Sometimes terrible things happen quite naturally," says the wan Dolphin Blue, and slowly Seth starts to believe it, as more and more of the locals turn up dead, and the soundtrack becomes increasingly portentious. Visually the film is astonishing, somehow remaining constantly spooky even in broad daylight, but the ambiance is irreparably shattered with an ending that either missteps disastrously in tone or tries to recast the previous events as a comedy. Ultimately director Philip Ridley is admirably uncompromising and singular in vision, and we will have to content ourselves with a flawed masterpiece.

 

The Replacement Killers (1998)

Contrary to expectations, the title does not refer to our heroes Chow Yun-Fat and Mira Sorvino, but rather to the assassins hired to finish the hit job Yun-Fat could not - and to finish off our heroes. Contrary to their expectations, however, Yun-Fat and Sorvino just happen to be a pair of badasses who soon make short shrift of anyone who looks at them the wrong way. Yun-Fat and Sorvino look fantastic from start to finish; it's a pity they had to recite such asinine dialogue. Very little in this film is original, but the director goes to a lot of trouble to give each scene some style and it doesn't ultimately feel like a waste of time. With a hunky James Rooker as a cop also on their trail, and one of the better soundtracks to come along in recent years.

 

The Return of the Secaucus Seven (1980)

What with having enjoyed my ten-year college class reunion last summer, and spent my last Christmas vacation driving around the Midwest visiting pals I hadn't seen in at least five years, the idea of a confab among old playmates is always an attractive concept, and John Sayles' gathering of former undergraduate political activists at a weekend getaway seems a sure winner until it's clear how poor a bunch of actors he's hired for this production. (Even David Strathairn proves less than chameleonic this time around.) Most everyone delivers their lives like first-year theater students, which makes even the occasional good bits of dialogue come across as painfully artificial. Return's not altogether unwatchable: there's a cute seduction scene, an adroit analysis of a barf, and one immortal addition to the English language (killing a deer = "Bambicide"), but it's possible my own reunions this past year would make for more convincing entertainment.

 

Rocky (1976)

It's fitting that a Bicentennial film celebrate the triumph of the working class in the land of opportunity, and in Philadelphia no less, a city suffused with so much early American history. Sylvester Stallone's small-time pugilist is far from perfect - he starts out as a mob enforcer, and later accepts financial support from the mafia when he's training for his big chance in the ring (like that's unusual in boxing films) - but he's iconically American in his determination to at least take advantage of his opportunities. Rocky Balboa's living far from Philly's upper crust, has barely enough social skills to survive his first date with Talia Shire's Adrian, and is essentially a crap-eating, Schlitz™-drinking slob - and he's just foolish enough to take on the World Heavyweight Champion to show he can "go the distance" and amount to something. (Carl Weathers' Apollo Creed wants to look magnanimous in providing an unranked fighter a chance at the title - as well as show the world a black man making mincemeat of a white guy - but Stallone's script fails to realize the boxing commission would hardly allow or broadcast such a stunt, a potential bloodbath of the briefest sort when two boxers of vastly different levels go head-to-head.) One would expect the most cheeseball of endings for this franchise-spawning slice of Americana, especially since it's already implausible enough that Adrian would fall for Rocky so quick, or that Rocky could get in shape so fast - but Stallone and director Jon Avildsen save the film's most redeeming feature for last. The southpaw makes good by fighting to a split decision - and if and if that's good enough for him, then that's just Cinderella-ish enough for me.

 

Romance (1999)

The French seem to have a monopoly on romantically-obsessed women (see The Mystery of Adèle H. or Savage Nights for contemporary examples), and director Catherine Breillat’s young schoolteacher here adds yet another variation to their rogues' gallery. It’s not remotely clear why she remains with her photo-model boyfriend who has no sexual interest in her, and even less understandable why she alternately seeks out sordid and anonymous encounters in the meantime while she agonizes over unrequited love. There’s as much vague soliloquizing as there explicit sex in this film, and the ultimate effect is clearly meant to render ironic the title. Her various philosophies fail to cohere, and anyone who sought this film out for its “sexual situations” (per the MPAA) will find all her speeches a glorious turn-off, but it’s possible that’s the point: Breillat may mean to lure the average male viewer with generous servings of nudity and sex, but she refuses to sensationalize any of it. It’s the least erotic erotic film ever, and though the central gamine is little more than a cipher, a mouthpiece for the director’s ideas, the final shocking scene makes clear her opinion of modern heterosexual relations: a wall lined with holes, out of each come the bottom halves of women’s bodies, and hordes of men partaking of the goods. The stark visual portrayal of how men may truly view women, and the equitable showings of both male and female genitalia throughout the film, will force you to examine your attitudes – if you aren’t bored to tears first.

 

Rosetta (1999)

I'd always assumed trailer parks were a uniquely American phenomenon, but it appears Europe has its share of manufactured housing as well, and according to Rosetta there's no shortage of unskilled and underemployed persons populating them, immigrant or otherwise. The young Emilie Dequenne's Rosetta aspires to classier digs, but she has an alcoholic mother to keep in check and acts essentially as the head of this two-person household while barely out of high school. It's her ceaseless drive for self-sufficiency that betrays a childhood that lacked any semblance of order, and she's virtually in perpetual motion trying to make ends meet and maintain a sense of keeping things under control. You wonder why the local factory seems unwilling to take her on, but it's possible she has difficulties getting along with others - when a boy she meets finds her mobile home to offer she cover his shifts now and then at his waffle stand, she physically assaults him out of shame over discovering her modest residence. Hers is one of the most palpably delineated personalities in world cinema of recent years, even when her apparent financial desperation drives her to do some unexpectedly treacherous deeds; it's a decidedly bleak portrait of Europe's labor situation, not to mention the most unsentimental film to ever come out of Belgium. Writer-director brothers Luc and Jean-Pierre Dardenne provide plenty of handheld camera action (though not as creatively as in their subsequent feature, The Son, thank goodness) in a tale that may be frustratingly open-ended but emphasizes above all Rosetta's quest for autonomy, a personal crusade that demands a sense of responsibility, even if it means calling into work before you try to kill yourself.

 

The Royal Tenenbaums (2001)

Another case of greatness out of the gate that later runs off the rails, if you don't mind me mixing my metaphors, and it doesn't help that you can see the boom mike descend from above in three different scenes! Tenenbaums has so much going for it: production designers and costumers going on all cylinders with vaguely retro designs, and an ample cast that dedicates itself to its dysfunctional personae with comedic finesse. Each member of the Tenenbaum clan is disappointed in everyone else, everyone's on the verge of a breakdown, and everybody's destiny is all too bound to that of their distinguished family. Gene Hackman, Ben Stiller, Gwyneth Paltrow, Bill Murray, Owen & Luke Wilson, Anjelica Huston et al are all uniformly a hoot, but it's director Wes Anderson who drops the ball when he (once again) doesn't know when to end a story. His poor sense of economy dooms the picture way before its vaguely misanthropic bent does, and by the time everyone realizes they desperately need therapy, you've realized Tenenbaums needed a bolder editor.

 

Runaway Bride (1999)

After enduring the nonsense of Notting Hill early in the summer of 1999, where Julia Roberts and Hugh Grant keep coming together and falling apart over and over for no apparent reason, I was certain I wasn't up for Runaway Bride a few short months later. I was doubly repelled when the ads announced the film heralded the reunion of the team that brought us Pretty Woman ten years earlier, a film where, everyone seems to have forgotten, Richard Gere pays Julia Roberts to give him a blowjob and then they fall in love and live happily ever after. Imagine my surprise when, once I grab a copy at the video store a year later, Runaway Bride is found to not require I suspend disbelief to the breaking point, and instead has me dying to know, as did the rest of the world much earlier, will she or won't she once again bolt from the altar? Julia is simply the most charming thing in the world, everyone else involved keeps up their end, and I returned the video feeling completely warm and fuzzy. Runaway Bride is that rare thing: a star vehicle that justifies our fascination with its stars.

 

Run Lola Run (1998)

This darling of the art-theater circuit in 1999 deserves every rave you may have heard: Run Lola Run is a breath of fresh air in a foreign film scene that all too often takes itself very, very seriously. Playful from start to finish, we're given three alternate narratives each offering divergent possible outcomes for everyone involved when Lola (the Claire Danes-ish Franka Potente) has twenty minutes to scare up 100,000 Deutsch Marks and save her slightly inept smuggler boyfriend from his criminal debtors. Each sequence presents a series of coincidences and near-misses that send character's lives careening in fortuitous or unenviable directions, even flash-forwarding to follow random passersby whose destinies can be irrevocably altered by Lola simply speeding by. Director Tom Tykwer's greatest stroke of genius among many is Lola's shock of neon cherry Kool-Aid hair, which grounds our eyes while she bolts throughout the gray city. It's a marvellous feat, threading together numerous mini-dramas, and it's good to see the Germans still possess such remarkable cinematic energy.

 

Russian Ark (2002)

Alexander Sokurov's paean to St. Petersberg's renowned Hermitage museum probably holds worlds more meaning for Russian audiences, with what seems to be an unending stream of cultural historical references specific to that always-evolving nation. Less worldly viewers can content themselves with spectacle over comprehension, as the camera explores the recently-restored Winter Palace (which housed the Tsars in the 18th and 19th centuries) and adjacent galleries in one unbroken ninety-five-minute take. It's the circumstances behind Ark's creation that impress more than actual plot - the premises were closed to the public for years during preparations, filming could only take place during a couple-hour window with the requisite amount of sunlight, and the crew made a few false starts before this final production came together. It's therefore the achievement you're busy admiring during those moments when the unseen central character (who appears to be some sort of ghost, seen by some but not all, and who marvels that he is suddenly able to speak Russian, so he must be from elsewhere - like us?) follows a black-garbed "Marquis" from room to room, listening to his various disquisitions on art and history; each corridor takes them to a different point in time as well, with one hall occupied by Catherine the Great and another filled with contemporary Japanese tourists.

Clearly there's more to this than a simple stroll - the gent whose perspective we share constantly advises caution, and later a clearly-discomfited docent asks them to leave. But how the camera blithely floats through the crowds, over orchestras, and down tiny hallways beggars belief - if anything, this is a triumph of spatial peregrination, and at the end of it all Sokurov's touched upon sculpture, painting ("Russians are talented at copying - why? Because they don't have ideas of their own - the authorities don't want them to"), dance, music, costume, pageantry, food, architecture, and, not least, drama: "Russia is like a theater," the Marquis opines, and an ambitious one at that. "The subtitles don't always match the audio, but a soundtrack is barely necessary when our eyes are taken on such a journey.)

 

The Saga of Anatahan (1953)

Would you believe that one of the most fascinating Japanese movies was written, directed, and produced by a German? None other than Josef Von Sternberg concocted this surreal "postscript to the Pacific conflict" in which a group of men - and one woman - are stranded on a three-square-mile island in 1944 halfway between Guinea and Japan, and for half a decade think World War II is still going strong. They sit around preparing for an Allied incursion, but no such combatants materialize - and they discover the true enemy was "in our own bodies." The presence of an attractive woman, Keiko, all but dismantles any semblance of law and order, especially when a pair of guns are found: "two old pistols - two new masters," the deadpan narrator explains. When all they can think about is getting laid (at least Keiko doesn't mind being the center of attention) it never occurs to them that having the guns only makes you a target, as everyone else seeks to usurp your authority. It's a dreamlike chronicle of a wholly distinct world, and Von Sternberg even forgoes the use of subtitles in place of a highly articulate and oftimes literary narrator who renders the anarchy all too clear.

 

Scary Movie (2000)

A passable, if tasteless, parody of various (mostly slasher) films of the late 90's, where for starters, all the main characters are named after the Brady Bunch children. The film's creators, Shawn & Marlon Wayans (and directed by Keenen Ivory), tread dangerous ground by satirizing films like Scream which themselves already deconstruct the slasher genre, but they strike gold when they introduce elements we've always wanted to see, like a killer who is, in truth, perfectly incompetent, and by finally addressing where everyone's parents are the whole time (hiding from Colombian drug lords, of course). His teenage victims, perfectly in tune with our desensitized media-drenched culture, stay sarcastic to the end (even after they're decapitated), refusing to believe any of this is really happening to them. Also a bit too much like Scream, the ending makes no sense whatsoever, but that's easily forgiven when we're treated to scenes where theater patrons at a screening of Shakespeare in Love beat the masked killer to the punch and together stab to death another viewer who refuses to stop talking throughout the movie. Never has wish fulfillment for a film critic appeared so blatantly on the screen. (Incidentally, if you can't get enough of films like these, it's worth your while to seek out Shriek if You Know What I Did Last Halloween, produced almost simultaneously as Scary Movie, and ultimately released on the USA Network instead. This film, though virtually identical in purpose, is actually more clever than the one that beat it to theaters - you can't top watching a cheerleader, on the verge of a messy demise, whip out a stick of Mentos and, Doo-doo-doo-doo-doo-doo, come up with a brilliant escape.)

 

Scream3 (2000)

Inevitably not as groundbreaking as the first installment, but hitting its marks just as brilliantly (part 2 was passable if perfunctory), this celebration of all that's good and bad about the slasher genre wraps up in a way most franchises can't: having not played all its cards in the previous films. Scream3 bleeds original ideas, not the least of which is upping the self-referential quotient to dizzying levels: between the developments of Scream2 and now, the world within the film has seen its own horror trilogy hit the silver screen about the same events, and now murderous hijinks are taking place on the set of the forthcoming "Stab 3." This gives the killer, to our delight, twice the bodies to perforate - the original survivors from Scream2, and their "Stab" counterparts cast with varying degrees of resemblance. What ensues is a dead-on parody of tinseltown, most effectively in the bickering between Courtney Cox-Arquette's still-persistent reporter and her Hollywood shadow as played by Parker Posey. Once again anyone could be the killer, once again anyone is liable to be offed, and once again, we can only pray that this franchise won't go on forever.

 

Secretary (2002)

Don't dismiss my forthcoming assertion that Maggie Gyllenhaal is the next Mary Steenbergen - she's got an Oscar® after all, so there's talent implied in that association. And her first lead role's a whopper - to watch such an innocent-looking pixie come under the sexual thrall of her boss is hard to take at first, but the road to female self-actualization is never a smooth one. Recently released from a psychiatric institution for a long history of self-abuse (she's a cutter) and determined to make a stable career for herself, she gains employ under E. Edward Gray (James Spader, never better), whose psychotically baroque offices (the interior decorating is both the best and worst element in the film) and perfectionist supervisory style (he keeps a menagerie of red sharpies yo correct any and all clerical typos) suggest neuroses of his own. (So does the permanent "Secretary Wanted" sign out front that lights up like a hotel vacancy sign when necessary.) When he starts ordering her what color clothes to wear and what to eat for dinner that night, or to dumpster dive for a lost document, the twist is she finds she enjoys the structure and simplicity of all the rules he's imposing on her.

Simultaneously confused and ecstatic, she starts exploring this S&M/B&D dynamic by relentlessly accommodating his demands until he discovers he's no match for her desire to serve. The media circus that ensues when she makes a last-ditch attempt to earn his trust is unlikely, as a lawyer risks serious public opprobrium for crossing the line with his subordinates, and S&M is a little tired as a topic these days, but if you can put the morality aside it's like a twenty-first-century Now, Voyager, about a girl's admirable quest to figure out what turns her crank and individualize herself. As well as a cautionary tale of how not to blend Asian and Western styles, shag carpeting, and wallpaper-size photographs of Greek ruins when designing your workplace - oh, the horror….

 

The Seven Year Itch (1955)

When certain personalities become so integrated into our cultural consciousness (everyone knows what Charlie Chaplin is all about, but how many people have actually sat through one of his films?), it's easy to take their enormous talent for granted. Perhaps this is a good thing, for when we do finally encounter their work we are amazed afresh. Over the years our collective cultural memory has reduced Marilyn Monroe to little more than an object of desire, and discounts her tremendous skill as a comedienne. I guarantee therefore that The Seven Year Itch will astound you. There is Monroe's unfathomable beauty, yes, flawless in scene after scene, but who expected her to deliver her lines with such calculated innocence, to use that body with such impeccable comic timing, to personify dizziness so accurately? This is something precious and rare, and paradoxically underappreciated when elevated to iconic status. Monroe is a sensation, but only when witnessed firsthand, otherwise she is diminished to cliché. Everyone thinks they know Marilyn; few run over to the classics section of their video store to discover how much greater she is than they imagined.

 

Shanghai Noon (2000)

Although there's nothing wrong with Jackie Chan's solo films, it's becoming clear he finds a greater audience in the U.S.A. when paired with a comedic partner. This time around he gets Owen Wilson, a highly articulate and painstakingly professional train robber who, had he been born in this era, would've found a home doing the New Age guru/interpersonal relations counselor/motivational speaker circuit. His character's largely an anachronism, and it's revisionist twists such as these that provide the most pleasure in Shanghai Noon. For one thing, this is the most multicultural portrayal of the Old West you'll ever see, with Chan travelling to Carson City in 1881 as a member of the Chinese Imperial Guard to retrieve the kidnapped Princess Pei Pei (Lucy Liu). First he is assimilated into a Native American tribe and even married off to the chief's daughter (says another tribal councilman, "It could be worse - at least he's not a white guy"), all the locals assume he's Japanese (though one dim settler sees him and corrects his wife: "They're not Injuns, woman, they're Jewish"), and he eventually finds himself in a showdown with the bad guys at a Spanish mission. Most humor is thanks to cultural misunderstandings, as hardly anyone speaks the same language, which provides more authentic diversity than we've ever seen in a Western, but the primary locus of cross-cultural bonding takes place between Chan (who co-produced) and Wilson, who alternately assists and betrays him. Chan faces various threats en route to rescuing the Princess (bandits, the mountains, Indians, U.S. marshalls, slave traders, and finally the Imperial Guard itself) while atop his horse, Fido (the first horse trained to sit upon command?) and soon builds up a reputation as the "Shanghai Kid." The choreography's relatively crude when compared to, say, The Legend of Drunken Master, and the violence and language are somewhat obviously sanitized (possibly to keep the film its PG-13 rating), but Chan, who never uses a gun once in the film, does some great things with a horseshoe and rope, and at least he has a very clever script to back him up - just wait until you hear what his character's name turns out to be.

 

She's All That (1999)

There are two kinds of teen films - those made for adults, and those made for teens. The first, exemplified by Clueless, for example, features dangerous levels of irony and playfully skewers the insecurities and traumas of adolescence from a safe (i.e. adult) distance. The latter school, in which this film belongs, may occasionally parody aspects of high school life, but ultimately the story is as old as dirt (the in-crowd versus those deemed unpopular) and the stakes are as dramatically urgent as in an after-school special. She's All That is particularly insidious in that the charming Freddie Prinze, Jr. makes us forget that he's being so sweet to Rachel Leigh Cook under false pretenses, that he's using her to win a bet, and in the end you still cheer for him. Somehow we are to believe that even after a guy is cruel to you, you just might discover he's actually meant to be your soul-mate. Don't be fooled: this is a teen film for teens where the star is the less evil of several bad guys, and we are made to love him for it. The filmmakers are trying to hedge their bets, and subsequently are peddling very questionable notions of heroism. That's as arrogant as the assumption that all the high school dramas set among rich & bright California kids, i.e. the vast majority, are somehow representative of the rest of America. They're probably not even representative of most California teen-agers. (This is also, notably, a PG-13 teen flick - is it because the MPAA has now deemed the F-word appropriate for 13-year-olds, but not when they're twelve? And you wonder why Congress is after Hollywood these days.)

 

Showgirls (1995)

It's perhaps the oldest Hollywood cliché - a young ingenue sets out to make it big in show business - except this is the 1990's, and she ain't no ingenue, and the compromises she faces to crawl her way to the top would give those girls in 42nd Street a heart attack. In contemporary renditions of this theme, gone are the illusions that success in the entertainment industry can be achieved without whoring yourself to some degree, and in the hands of Paul Verhoeven, Showgirls similarly leaves just about nothing to the imagination. It may be unfashionable to suggest that this film, often cited in movie jokes as among the worst ever, really is quite passable. (In light of what we now know goes on, in Vegas and beyond, it certainly can't be faulted for its honesty.) The T & A factor is second only to Caligula, to be sure, and the script only slightly less predictable, but it does raise one pertinent question: who in their right mind would ever think Elizabeth Berkley is attractive? It may sound uncharitable, and she does try very hard, but if Verhoeven and scripter Joe Eszterhas (both hot off the success of Basic Instinct) thought they'd discovered the next Sharon Stone, they're grossly mistaken (as Berkley's subsequent career has illustrated). In truth, you need look no further for the wow! factor than her co-star, Gina Gershon, whose jaw - and talent - are a thing of wonder. As Berkley's dancer wanna-be "works" her way up the ladder as a Vegas showgirl, we hear the film's thesis loud and clear: it's all just different degrees of prostitution. News to no one, to be sure, except to Berkley's character, but it's a trashily fun ride watching her get the point.

 

Signs & Wonders (2000)

Deeply brilliant, and profoundly flawed. Director Jonathan Nossiter delivers a marvel of elliptical storytelling, presented with surprisingly stunning colors for digital video. Also marvelous is Charlotte Rampling, who communicates endless frustration over her husband’s sudden need to subject every random physical object to interpretation, and concluding it’s all telling him to leave her for another woman. Sadly, the last quarter ruins what could’ve been the most fascinating film of the year; as Signs nears its end it all makes less and less sense, until it’s finally completely inscrutable. Nossiter falls flat on his face with this one, but he is to be applauded for taking great risks – he’s either going to turn into a great filmmaker or an irrelevant one, but certainly not average.

 

The Sinner (1950)

A fascinating representation of a certain amoral postwar mentality, cloaked in the guise of a melodrama. Willi Forst pulls no punches in presenting the moral bankruptcy of the generation that came of age during WWII, as its hardened youths grow into absolute libertines in a psychological maneuver to avoid their collective traumas. Hildegard Knef, looking like a young Catherine O'Hara, takes "a few steps in the gutter" starting with her stepbrother (who pays her for regular shags) and sleeping her way through wartime (to bypass "the fear of death") until she falls hard for a "has-been painter" (who enjoys portraying her on the canvas as Phyryne, the classical Greek figure who stood naked before her judges and was exonerated). He's got a malignant brain tumor, though, which teaches her that true love isn't about equitable transactions but "means giving and giving and giving." Forst's hyperactive camera comes up with some great angles in which to frame his tightly-plotted series of flashbacks and flash-forwards, and the almost incidental critique of Germany's moral failings is surprising for coming so soon after the war; his only failing may be in staging a double suicide as a painfully romantic gesture.

 

Sisters (1972)

Brian De Palma's signature style of cinematic obviousness either works brilliantly or implodes ungracefully, and Sisters sadly belongs to the latter camp. His first mistake is in explaining things too quickly, and therefore robbing any mystique from the set-up where Margot Kidder plays two once-conjoined twins - one sane, the other less so. Then when a reporter tracks them to an "experimental madhouse" (do those only exist in the movies?) the shift in the story's focus from Kidder's duo to the journalist's plight at the hands of their evil doctor is the second equally fatal misstep - it's all sufficiently creepy, but hardly suspenseful. The weird dream newsreel/hallucination sequence fails to elicit interest as well, and though it's neat to see both Kidder and New York City so long ago, the rest dates exceedingly poorly. De Palma's since done much better (Carrie, The Untouchables, Femme Fatale) and much worse (Hi, Mom!, Mission: Impossible, Obsession), which is still probably a better track record than most - fans exploring his hit-and-miss career will certainly come to respect his persistence in the most uncertain of industries.


Sitting Pretty (1948)

Welcome to the Hummingbird Hill suburbs, where everybody knows a little too much about everyone else, and what the neighbors know about Marueen O'Hara and Robert Young's kids is that they're fantastically out of control. The film offers no reasons behind their intractability - certainly a modern production would place blame squarely on the parents for lax discipline - but all are in agreeance a nanny is needed. Enter Mr. Belvedere (Clifton Webb), the very source of the 80's TV series, and the star of numerous sequels - a Britisher of impeccable comportment who, though confessing to hating kids and refusing to cook, proves more than capable in an incongruous position that sends the gossipy community all atwitter. O'Hara's delivery is a little too practiced, but no one's prepared for all the clever rejoinders Belvedere dishes up at the right moments - the best among them: "only an idiot is completely happy anywhere." The plot makes a hard turn at the end when all sorts of secrets come out in the open, and it's hard to believe the central dissembler isn't punished more, but director Walter Lang adeptly keeps us in our seats without complaint.

 

Sobibor, 10/14, 1943, 16h (2001)

Claude Lanzmann's follow-up to his epic Holocaust documentary Shoah was originally supposed to be a part of that earlier production, but the story it recounts contrasted so sharply with all of Shoah's woe it ultimately merited its own distinct release. The title pinpoints the moment when the inhabitants of a Belarussian concentration camp rose up against their German captors and fled to freedom, an instance of self-determination so rarely mentioned in Holocaust lore it almost defies belief. Lanzmann interviewed the remaining participants back in 1979, including Yehuda Lerner, who escaped no less than eight different camps in six months when he was a teenager, and helped plan the intricately-detailed rebellion that in the end killed thirteen Nazis. It's a tale that deserves to be heard ho matter how belatedly, and though Sobibor is hardly cinematic in the retelling (most scenes offer little more than a static camera and a solitary speaker), it's the least we can do to listen. Just prepare yourself for the interminable list of the numbers killed at each camp that appends the film (and recited in voice-over by the director) - despite the achievement of the escapees, not for a second does Lanzmann want you to forget how many others died before and during the Final Solution's execution - in Sobibor's camp alone, another quarter-million didn't make it out alive. It's more an act of conscience than a desire to be entertained that will bring you to this film - but it's also the least we can do, to devote an hour and a half to remembering the courage of those subject to one of the lowest points in human history.

 

The Son's Room (2001)

I drove all the way to Toledo to see this Palme d'Or winner, and Nanni Moretti's Cannes triumph is both a lot less funny and a lot less concerned with Italian politics than his earlier works like Caro Diario and Palombella Rossa. Moretti tackles a weighty subject that American audiences saw at the same time in In The Bedroom - the death of a teenage child - but these parents have no one to revenge themselves upon. Their high-school-age son drowns in a cave while scuba diving, and Room explores the emotional landscape the family must traverse in trying to make sense of it all. Dad Moretti, a psychiatrist, blames himself for choosing to attend to a suicidal patient instead of accompanying his son on that dive, and the accruing guilt eventually dismantles any sympathy he previously had for his damaged clients and their self-absorbed issues. (His colleague encourages him for his own sake to vent at the guy who took him away that fateful day, but now the hapless man's got cancer.) Amidst all their grief, they later learn their son had a long-distance girlfriend they knew nothing about, and they seek her out as a sort of still-vibrant connection to their now-ghostly son. It's a bittersweet encounter, meeting this girl who could've been part of their family, and it's Moretti's most impressively mature work to date, quietly devastating - and worth driving to another state for.

 

The Sound of Music (1965)

Salzburg, at the end of the thirties, and Julie Andrews is famously spinning around in the hills, but not as much as I remembered. I use the word "remembered" loosely, as I'd never actually seen Music before, and refer instead to the endless cultural references one runs across in one's lifetime before you actually go rent the film. Especially in the church that shaped my undergraduate years - the cinema was assumed to be an improper influence and prohibited by the Christian Reformed Church until this Robert Wise creation came along and won everyone over - it's hard not to be inundated with Music lore, but nothing replaces the real thing, which turns out to be better - and much less saccharine - than anyone could've foretold. Both Andrews and Charmian Carr (as Liesl) seem a bit old for their parts, but Christopher Plummer's awfully dashing for his age, and even when the kids put on their puppet show you'll be too mesmerized to roll your eyes. Wise maintains a compelling narrative pace, and even explores some interesting psychological territory with Rolf the proto-Nazi, but thankfully the final result is far from insufferably cheery, and its historical charming of the cinematically-wary is hardly inconceivable. (Especially with Richard Haydn cast as Max!)

 

Spawn (1997)

That cape, that cape, that cape: some cinematic creations are so visually pleasurable that they justify an entire film. And in Spawn we finally find a caped crimefighter that can pull off wearing one without looking ridiculous (what is Superman's for, anyway? To check the direction of the wind? At least Batman's helps him look creepy). This sort of fantastic fashion statement is exactly what CGI is for, and Spawn's digital effects as a whole are pretty impressive, with the exception of a Satan who looks straight out of a video game. We also get cheeseball dialogue and narration, delivered in those cliched breathy overtones of menace, that should remain exclusive to the comic book domain, but they are easily ignored when confronted with the main character's kick-ass nectoplasmic armor and fourth-degree-burned face. And that cape! How many more days until Halloween? (There's a plot, too: double-crossed first-caliber government assassin is groomed post-mortem to lead the devil's armies against the gates of heaven in return for seeing his wife again, but he eventually decides his new boss doesn't have his best interests in mind and switches camps. I'd seriously consider replacing him if I could have his cape!)

 

Spider (2002)

David Cronenberg put an awful lot of work into such a slight film; the attention to detail as he recreates a relentlessly gloomy postwar London working-class neighborhood feels like such a waste when the end result is so irrelevant. Ralph Fiennes' Mr. Cleg checks out of an insane asylum and into a decaying boarding house and confronts some unpleasant childhood memories that, we assume, made him the mightily impaired sort he is today. Muttering to himself, dressing in multiple overlayed shirts, subject to the occasional panic attack, and more than a little paranoid, Cleg pores daily over his tin of treasured possessions, including a homemade journal that he's written in his own idiolect. His diary instigates flashbacks where Cleg watches his father (Gabriel Byrne) neglect his mother (Miranda Richardson) and philander with the crassest of floozies at the pub (Richardson again) and ultimately plot to replace the former saint with the latter tart. (The adult Cleg places himself within these long-past events as a grown-up, observing events he couldn't possibly have witnessed first-hand, so the veracity of these memories is highly questionable.)

It seems that Cleg was perfectly well-adjusted as a child, so the dominant question becomes exactly how he ended up so debilitated; it's also possible that the silo that overshadows his building - sometimes full as he walks by, sometimes half-full, sometimes empty - is to serve as some sort of metaphorical commentary, but perhaps only Cronenberg knows exactly what. Lynn Redgrave looks perpetually put-upon as the overseer of Cleg and his various elderly fellow lodgers in this tenement with its brown water, startlingly-angled ceilings, and dusty wallpaper; and though Fiennes' inscrutability is commendable as a performance, the script's comparable impenetrability must be regarded as a shortcoming. Like with his M. Butterfly, Spider's substantial visual textures only mask the most meager of storylines - it makes you yearn for Cronenberg's schlockier days.

 

Spider-Man (2002)

Welcome to an anachronistic Manhattan where crime is around every corner - because if there wasn't, what would all those superheroes do with themselves - volunteer in soup kitchens, or in Iraq? Scripter David Koepp had a tough job in condensing everyone's favorite web-slinger's origin, and that of his arch-enemy, into a feature-film-size package, but he's masterfully organized the flow of ideas so that director Sam Raimi can dive right into the genetically-engineered blue & red spider biting high school senior and wussball Peter Parker (Tobey Maguire) and repeatedly rescuing neighbor and unrequiting object of affection Mary Jane Watson (Kirsten Dunst) from unhinged industrialist Norman Osborn (Willem Dafoe) a.k.a. the Green Goblin - who also happens to be his best friend's dad. The arachnid's toxin garbles Parker's own DNA in all the good ways, buffing up his body and erasing his myopia (plus the wall-crawling, web-spinning, and spider-sense extras), but he's still a kid who can't get up the nerve to ask Mary Jane out and whose best idea for his new abilities is to make a buck in the semi-professional wrestling circuit.

Uncle Ben dies, Aunt May perseveres, Daily Bugle editor J. Jonah Jameson seethes, and the super-nimble Parker transforms the skyscrapers into his own personal jungle gym - we've got all the requisite components of his legend firmly in place - but other elements don't transfer onto celluloid quite so seamlessly: it's never explained from whence came Peter's fashionista powers to whip up with the ornate costume without eyeslits, or how he explains to Jameson how he can get all those photos of Spider-Man in action, and he certainly wouldn't've swung off that building the first time without testing his web's tensile strength first. There's always sequels to address the loose ends, of course, and Spider-Man's strength is in never losing focus on what is essentially a tale of young love, and of a working-class Queens kid taking down the rich corporate mogul, as well as further proof that Maguire and Dunst are watchable in just about anything.

 

Spirits of the Dead (1968)

Or, Extradordinary Tales of Edgar Allen Poe, per its original French title. Three characteristic short stories of mortality, misanthropy, and the supernatural, translated to the screen by Vadim, Malle, and Fellini, presented in declining order of excellence. First you'll marvel at a young, breathtaking, and utterly soulless Jane Fonda (actually speaking French!) playing a sadistic countess who falls for a neighboring baron (played, in a twisted moment of casting, by her brother Peter), is rejected by him, and has him killed, only to believe he's returned to bedevil her in the form of a black stallion. Next Alain Delon plays William Wilson, a heartless idler who keeps running into his doppelganger during his cruellest moments (with Brigitte Bardot always caught in the middle), and resolves to do away with him for good, at great cost to himself. Lastly the completely incoherent "Toby Dammit" sequence, with Terence Stamp as a flavor-of-the-moment English actor among the Roman glitterati, drinking himself stupid, and driving recklessly in a new Alfa Romeo. One imagines Poe was a little less stupefying on the printed page than he is presented here; you're better off first enjoying all the outfits Vadim squeezes his comely wife Jane into and then taking the video back quickly. Malle's centerpiece is more an intellectual exercise, and the finale an evocation of a certain paranoid and occult atmosphere, but neither narrative is worthy of its source. Case in point: which has survived the passage of time, Poe or this film?

 

Starship Troopers (1997)

Revisiting the sardonic view of the future he initiated in Total Recall, director Paul Verhoeven reaffirms his status as King of the modern 'B' picture with Starship Troopers. The script telegraphs itself from a thousand miles away, as we follow three earnest teenagers pursuing their dreams in Earth's military forces while engaged in war against a nasty arachnid race from the planet "Klendathu," but Verhoeven's attention to detail, his keeping his tongue firmly in cheek, and his trademark over-the-top gore factor engages from start to finish. The film would have fallen apart if it had taken itself too seriously, and Verhoeven never lets us forget that the whole point is to have fun. Mimicking the earnest sci-fi flicks of the 50's with an equally cheeseball script, but this time with astonishing visual effects, the film does manage to keep you guessing where it will all lead, with only two things certain: the body count will be high, and those that survive will be a mess. This is a solidly entertaining second-tier picture, nothing to be ashamed of, with all the right elements firmly in place, a quality guilty pleasure if there ever was one. Featuring Denise Richards' eyebrows, almost as scary a sight as the bugs themselves.

 

Star Trek: First Contact (1996)

Used to be the Star Trek films succeeded in appealing to larger audiences because their dilemmae and tight spots felt palpably threatening - now their storylines seem overly-concerned with their own continuity, engendering a solipsistic universe of little interest to anyone not already immersed in the Trek mythos. In this installment the Enterprise crew have to go back in time to ensure their own existence – an adventure that hardly seems relevant in the bigger Hollywood picture. At least First Contact has the Borg, who are endlessly creepy (they’re a uni-minded cyborganic species incessantly determined to integrate everyone who crosses their path into their ranks, robbing them of their individuality), and their queen (Alice Krige), who is no less appealing for being half-robot (and, considering her sexy line readings, apparently perpetually aroused). But the true indication of the film’s narrow target audience is its idea of humor: the jokes thud abysmally, but maybe not if you’re well-versed in (or care much about) “Next Generation” lore and its cast of characters. Myself, I’m rooting for the Borg.

 

Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace (1999)

Some menace, indeed - so formidable that an 8-year-old boy can single-handedly destroy the bad guys' early Deathstar model from the inside and treat it all like a video game. The premise of this trilogy is intriguing enough - witnessing how a Christ-like child in whom "the Force is very strong" can grow to instead become Darth Vader, the archenemy of Episodes 4-6. But writer/director George Lucas' obvious weakness for computer generated imagery betrays Part I, by blinding him to the continued necessity of a compelling plot and cast of characters. (The pen is ever mightier than the blue screen. Remember how Titanic wasn't nominated for the Best Original Screenplay Oscar®?) The result is more ephemeral than anything the poor actors had to pretend to interact with. You come compelled by the Event-ness of the film, and then are cast adrift by the absence of narrative economy: instead of scenes justified by pushing the narrative forward, they are clearly little more than opportunities to showcase Industrial Light & Magic's digital wizardry. Though comparisons to the original trilogy may be unfair, they are less so when the film tries to feed off their reputation, and this film entirely lacks the kinds of characters that made the first series so enjoyable: there's no Han Solo, there's no Princess Leia, and even though technically there is, there's no Obi-Wan. Any critic could pounce on this film to argue for a deteriorated and decadent contemporary moviemaking scene; instead, this abortive attempt at making more film history simply helps illustrate how elusive greatness can be.

 

The Stepfather (1987)

We'll ignore the sound mikes invading the frame from above, the few script implausibilities, and the cheap synthesizer soundtrack so easily associated with 80's horror/slasher flicks: The Stepfather illustrates brilliantly that a modest production can transcend its 'B' status with intelligent direction, bold acting, and avoiding cheap shots like things jumping out at you every five minutes. Joseph Ruben's 1987 creation follows a psychopath (played with chameleonic genius by Terry O'Quinn) who integrates himself into fatherless homes in the search for the American Dream but somehow always ends up disappointed, and feels the need to start over afresh, leaving a bloody trail in his wake. This time he becomes "Jerry" the realtor, weds former Charlie's Angel Shelly Hack, and finds his new resentful stepdaughter difficult to win over. (She's a handful to begin with: expelled from school for fighting, she remarks how her new father figure is "gonna kill me," the first of a steady stream of inadvertent one-liners.) O'Quinn switches from caring head of household to (privately) raving maniac on a dime, and just as he and Steph "bury the hatchet" his façade starts to crumble. The film is clearly a product of its era, with foggy interiors, portentious music, and reporters stumbling upon clues far too easily, but the strengths far outweigh the weak spots: Ruben understands it's all about build-up, and to his credit he doesn't overdo the final chase scene. The Stepfather coaxes some great stunts and performances out of everyone, and is aging remarkably well to stand out among a most degraded genre.

 

The Sting (1973)

This film’s guilty of the same shortcoming that turned me off of the Ocean’s Eleven remake two years ago – our heroes are always one step ahead of the law, and are never once truly challenged. The only kinks in the con men’s plans are themselves entirely staged, and the result is a smug tale that merely illustrates the virtues of thorough planning. Typical dramatizations of admirable cinematic heroism usually require the stars beat the odds and rise above their circumstances and discover their true fortitude of character as they encounter various obstacles, but here Redford and Newman have accounted for every possibility well in advance and only feign any moments of weakness. The Depression-era sets and designs are charming (though I’m unsure they had fluorescent lighting just yet), director George Roy Hill unfolds the tale at a perfect clip, and Newman and Redford generate enough combined Hollywood wattage to power several former Soviet republics, but their characters are never really tested, and are therefore never truly impressive.

 

The Straight Story (1999)

The Straight Story is a slow yarn, and that is its genius. This paper-thin tale of a septuagenarian travelling cross-country on a riding lawn mower to see his ailing estranged brother crawls as quickly as the film's central piece of machinery. Prepare yourself for one of the most languid films not made by the French, Japanese, or Russians; it takes some time before you realize how little is spoken, how little happens, and how enrapt you've become. Director David Lynch, thankfully back in form, probably did very little to direct Richard Farnsworth's portrayal of the stubborn protagonist who touches the lives of all he meets along the way, and the script filled probably no more than a few pages, and the gamble pays off. (Couldn't the Oscar® for Best Actor have been shared by Spacey and Farnsworth?) Most significantly, though, the film bravely dares to mine a compelling subject that Hollywood is typically loath to exploit: you exit saying, more films about old people, please.

 

Stroszek (1977)

Werner Herzog's movies are famously taken with the unique character of geographical settings, but Stroszek finally proves preoccupied with its rural American environment at the expense of factuality. After a trio of German oddballs (one a mentally-challenged ex-con, one a prostitute, one an elderly conspiracy theorist) place their faith in the USA's reputation of instant prosperity ("everyone makes money there, we can too"), they find themselves in a backwards world of cinder blocks, propane tanks, and deer hunters - and buying mobile homes on credit. It's unlikely banks lend to non-permanent aliens on a tourist visa with virtually no income or savings (unless Herzog's trying to indict predatory lenders), nor is it plausible (after another German movie made clear, Siodmak's My Schoolmate) that immigration would allow in someone with both a history of mental illness and a criminal record. Herzog additionally sidesteps how Germans and Americans can hold conversations with no knowledge of each other's vocabulary, but once again this isn't about the story - Stroszek shows just how foreign even America's heartland can appear to some people. (You wonder what the locals thought of a European film crew invading their town - and it that already-fading municipality even exists anymore.) To his credit, Herzog's never condescending to this populace who simply pull out a bad tooth themselves with pliers, or plows their land with shotguns in hand at all times, but the overall impression still ain't pretty. "Here they [kick you] spiritually," Bruno complains (with his usual inimitable delivery), "they do it politely - with a smile - it's worse." There's some comedy amidst the winter gloom, but you can bet these guys are wishing they'd just taken the train to France instead.

 

Superfly (1972)

Enough time has finally passed that the seventies, no longer regarded as simply degraded and stylistically gauche, can now be enjoyed for all their rakish film expressions, not least the Blaxploitation genre. The clothes and hair are no longer painfully embarrassing and are instead pleasurable to behold, if sometimes for their comedic value. Behold, in Superfly, the world of the ghetto before rap, if you can imagine that; and while Ron O’Neal’s Priest isn’t exactly pushed to his limits as he fights for African-Americans’ place in the free (and job, and black) market, he certainly possesses a certain presence. And director Gordon Parks, Jr. carries it all off with enough confidence to keep the story on the better side of credibility. Priest’s girlfriend’s mustache could use a waxing, and I’ve never seen a hero snort so much cocaine, but the leather, suede, fur, ankhs, and fedoras are just plain smooth.

 

Swingers (1996)

For anyone contemplating a move to Los Angeles, do I have a movie for you. In Swingers, Jon Favreau delivers a clever script guiding us through the bars, clubs, and hillside parties of late-night LA and reaffirming the eternal awkwardness of the heterosexual singles scene. Favreau himself plays a reluctant bachelor, owner of the single most depressing apartment in all of southern California, trying to find his footing after the end of a six-year relationship and repeatedly assotting himself in the process. He and his friends, all twentysomething wanna-be actors failing to find their big break, have their individual strategies for getting into the ladies' hearts (or pants), and Favreau wilts under their conflicting streams of advice. Most painful, and brilliant, is when our protagonist hits rock bottom, passing through all the stages of a relationship, from first conversation to breakup, in the course of seven consecutive answering machine messages. It's quite possible, in the end, that Favreau intends for LA-slash-Hollywood and the singles scene to be metaphors for each other - both environments have seemingly unknowable rules for success, and both can ultimately crush you despite all your efforts. Which means, before heading out west, you have a litmus test available to you: if you've got the stomach for one, you're sufficiently prepared for the other.

 
Go to Index Page Go to Film Page Go to Video Page Go to Quickies Page Go to Macrology Page Go to Search Page Go to Links Page Go to Colophon Page